Message from a sober gay alcoholic
“When l first came in to AA l knew l was different… I now know differently.
There was a niggling part of me that thought l had a drinking problem because l was a gay woman. I once heard a man share at a meeting that if that sentiment was true, it meant that all gay people would be alcoholic. That made sense to me. As l look back today l seem to have had a lot of shame associated with my sexuality. Being a member of AA l learned that l wasn’t alone in my thinking, there were other members in my gay home group that understood my way of thinking and feeling.
It doesn’t matter whether l am gay or straight or anything in between if l have the alcoholic condition l have it.
My drinking days revolved around partying, nightclubs and indiscretions, working hard and playing hard. Sexuality was very much a part of my drinking. In my drinking days, l was attracted to people that drank and behaved the way l did, so when l found AA and started my sober life l was dealing with much shame, guilt and remorse.
I always used to think that no one thought the way l did, no one felt the way l did, and no one drank the way l did. Being a part of my AA home group and sharing of myself l realised that l was not alone with this stuff and that so many members thought the way l did, felt the way l did and had drank the way l did.
I had an immediate sense of hope and relief from my first AA meeting. I’m no one special. The freedom from alcohol and all that goes with it is available to anyone that wants it.”